Article #2 Title
May 14, 2020
Communicating. It’s kind of like breathing. We do it every day without thinking much about it, yet we couldn’t last long without it.
We interact with the people and world around us for our most basic needs: food and water, shelter, love and belonging, esteem, and achieving our potential, not to mention accomplishing our day-to-day tasks and life pursuits. Yet, it seems to me that while we all communicate in one way or another, and some of us think we’re pretty darn good at it, we haven’t yet begun to grasp the full co-creative potential that our ability to communicate gives us.
Forty years of studying human communication, psychology, and social change theories, as well as conducting countless formal and informal action research studies of people relating with one another in all kinds of situations, has led me to some observations and conclusions I’m compelled to share. Central among them:
- Whatever we humans set out to do—the good (sometimes outstanding), the bad, and the ugly—is grounded in how we choose to interact with one another and our immediate circumstances from one moment, day, year, decade, and even century to the next. We construct our realities through our interactions.
- Further, a lot about how we choose to communicate with the world outside ourselves has a great deal to do with how we communicate within ourselves.
- Lastly, as much as we yearn for stability, certainty and predictability, we know they’re illusions in the natural complexity of life happening. Learning to navigate—and dance with—the inevitable changes we encounter informs our responsive communication.
I’ve been fortunate to encounter numerous opportunities for interacting with people throughout my life—consulting with organizational leaders, teaching, conducting organizational research, engaging with thought leaders and community projects, and being in relationships with family and friends. Whether helping to solve problems, plan strategy, resolve conflict, build teams, initiate large-scale organizational change, streamline work processes, embark on a remodeling project, or organize a 90th birthday celebration, I’ve learned that communicating with the people involved in the particular situation is a co-creative process of human interaction. We aim to construct mutually satisfying outcomes together.
In recent years, I’ve begun writing about what I’ve come to call “Generative Communication.” Today, more than ever, we can trace the fault lines of our growing personal and societal challenges to the powerful communication locomotive we’ve been traveling on for generations—steaming full speed ahead. NOW is the time to get off that dangerous iron horse at the next train stop and quickly board a new communication train that is waiting for us—a generative train, one designed for today’s complex world in which we must dig deep inside ourselves and discover communication capabilities we’ve been ignoring in the name of progress.
Yes. We humans have co-created amazing things through our everyday interactions since we first walked the earth some five to seven million years ago. Even in the last 350 years, our progress has been astonishing and continues to accelerate with each decade. We’re extraordinary creatures in the interdependent web of life on earth.
Seeing ourselves as part of that web, and recognizing our unique gifts of consciousness and cognition that set us apart from other life forms upon which we depend for survival, is the first hill we must climb as we pick up speed on the new generative communication train. With our gifts comes the responsibility to develop and use them for our own well-being and that of the inter-related living communities of which we’re a part!
Where will the new generative communication zephyr take us? What are we co-creating through our human interactions on the way? What do we aspire to achieve? How are we contributing to our own evolution and that of our humanity? What do we want to leave behind in the path of our journey? What exactly does it mean to communicate generativity?
This post is the first in a series of essays introducing the Generative Communication I envision. Subsequent posts will address some of these questions and more. I welcome your responses as we grow the idea of co-creating, together, the realities in which we want to live.
Stay tuned.
Mary A. Ferdig, Ph.D.
Looking forward to your future essays.
I’m looking forward to sharing more about what I’ve been learning about generative communication, one essay at a time.
I’m tuned in and eager to hear more about generative communication. Maybe time for that book on the subject?
I’m eager to share more. A book is in the works.
Mary, I’m so looking forward to communicating more with you! 😁
Thanks Sherry! Yes, to communicating more.
Thought provoking, Mary. I am very eager to read more. Wish I were there for a good, long conversation with you. Hugs!
We’re due for a good, long conversation. I always love learning with you!
Good work, Mary.
Thanks! Stay tuned. . .
I have seen that how we communicate with one another (words or otherwise) can change outcomes dramatically. It has always amazed me that when I go into a situation with optimism and vigor (by way of practice AND having taken care of my mind and body through diet, sleep, etc…) the outcome is vastly different than when I am tired, stressed, hungry, etc. “Choice” in how I communicate seems elusive when my biology and learned patterns take control. Knowing this interaction between biology and communication has helped me make better life choices resulting in better relationships. I’m looking forward to learning more about your insights. Our world needs the best minds to show us a more humane way forward.
Thanks, Andrea! You make good points about the relationship between biology and communication. Learning to observe ourselves when we’re tired, stressed, and hungry gives us information we can act on–for example, postponing a challenging conversation until we’re in a more balanced biological, emotional and mental state. Noticing our learned, often habitual and unconscious, patterns of communicating is another good source of information about ourselves.
That awareness, as you’ve clearly discovered, can help us consciously interrupt those patterns by trying another approach. Self-awareness is key to generative communication. Not only does it enhance our relationships, but gives us solid footing for building understanding and resolving challenges that naturally arise. Kudos to you!
Mary, my friend, my very first thought when reading your article was how very pleased and proud your parents were and are of you. I see their smiling faces and feel their presence. Each of them so gentle and genuine.
Generative Communication – if it’s very simplified meaning is all generations communicating ideas, desires and feelings to reach a balanced outcome for living peacefully together. It’s a utopian idea that I long for. I am skeptical the masses will cooperate but you must try.
Gloria, my friend, thank you for your memory of my dear parents. Much of my thinking is grounded in their examples.
I love your pragmatism! Living peacefully together is an ideal to aim for, but likely unattainable. I hope to illustrate how generative communication doesn’t promise utopia, but, in fact, encourages us to deal with the hard stuff openly and honestly–genuinely listening to others whose beliefs and values can be very different than our own, without compromising who we are and our own beliefs and values. Some refer to this practice as learning to “walk the narrow ridge,” seeking an expanded understanding of a particular situation and moving toward good enough solutions that those involved can live with. It’s a never-ending process of being human.
Please also see an article in the September 2017 issue of The Atlantic journal, p. 58+, titled Has the Smartphone Destroyed a Generation? The graphs on p. 62 are instructive.
Thank you for highlighting the Atlantic journal article. The graphs are not only instructive but alarming. This is an example of societal trends that are negatively impacting iGen teens. It seems the solutions are in the hands of the teens themselves. Put down the phone, shut off your laptops and find ways to communicate that doesn’t involve a screen!
I anticipate your future writings. … I, and others, reflect on the decreased in-person communication because of the impact of social media.
More and more studies are revealing the negative impact of habitual, out-of-control use of social media as a primary means of communicating. This is a societal dilemma that deserves our attention!
Mary,
I love this idea. . We need to learn how to transverse through the roads that are filled with hot stones and deep puddles!?? Miss seeing you in Connections!
Cindy
An idea worth pursuing in today’s environment. Your work in Africa is, indeed, an example of generative communication.
Marvelous! Much needed-especially as we emerge from pandemic fear and isolation.
Yes, pandemic fear and isolation, and so much more that is heaving and buckling in the ground beneath our feet. It’s both exhilarating and fighting to be alive today in the midst of an epic cultural and environmental reckoning accelerated by the proliferation of information and technology. I learned about generative communication from my observations of you as a generative leader, a topic I’ll delve into for a future essay.
I await description on how to implement generative communication. This concept is intriguing, I have been handicapped by this other way of communicating. What would the label for this be? Stimulus Response Communication?
Stimulus-response is a natural phenomenon as studied by biology and physics. Generative communication invites considered responses, appropriate for the situation, to be adapted in each iteration as needed for shared understanding. Stimulus-REACTION, on the other hand, is a way of communicating that tends to escalate in a cyclical pattern that feeds on itself. There are many other descriptors of “this other way of communicating,” which we shall delve into.
Life has its social rhythms that can eventually coalesce to reconnect the resident persons within a large community. And so, here we are. Amidst the devastating loss of our nation’s social cohesion, we yearn for a strategy to heal every person’s capabilities for improving their Social Mobility and decreasing their Social Isolation. The website includes an effort to define 15 concepts for a Design Epistemology as the basis for social-political-economic reform. Now retired for close to 5 years, the 15 concepts have been “in development” since about 2007.
Paul
Epistemology! One of my favorite topics, roughly defined as the philosophical study of the nature, origin, and limits of human knowledge. Your comment sent me on a search for articles about Design Epistemology, and I like the notion of “taking charge of our own evolution” from a trans-disciplinary perspective grounded in wholeness. I’m eager to learn more, particularly your 15 concepts “in development.”
Bravo, Mary! I am so excited for you and your tenacity. I so look forward to this chapter in your life, and I am thrilled to stay tuned.
Blessings,
Diane
Thank you, Diane. A chapter in my life of study and learning, indeed.
Generative Communication relies on a radical new way of seeing, thinking, and being grounded in integrated wholeness on behalf of the commonwealth. It’s time we step up to the challenge.
How intriguing, Mary. I look forward to reading your subsequent posts.
I hope to make them worthy of your continued interest!
Keep me on your list .
I value your interest.
Interesting. I look forward to the next post. Co-creating is so much easier said than done. I know you’ll share the tools and your insights to move us along the path.
You’re right that co-creating worthy outcomes is easier said than done. Perhaps the first step is a willingness to try.
These are good insights. How we agree to be together is so important.
I have developed the Dynamical Organizations Theory; Openness, Synthesis and Emergence which emphasizes the role of communication.
The paper was published in 2017 in the journal Emergence: Complexity and Organization, December 31.
If you would be interested, I can send you a copy.
Best to you
Dick
I’m not surprised that communication is a feature of dynamic organizations. I’d love to read your paper. Please send!
I really like where you are going with this!
Thanks! Clearly, a spiral of self-accountability is at the heart of Generative Communication.
Sounds very interesting, Mary. I will be following to see how this evolves.
I’m looking to you and others to help me evolve this concept. Jointly building collective awareness and knowledge, followed by meaningful action on behalf of the commonwealth is core to Generative Communication.